*** This was originally posted at catlander. More posts from there will likely end up here. I'm sorry if it's a little confusing for a little while, but things will smooth out and get a little more cohesive soon. ***
Step One - Determine what the change needs to be.
-to have a smaller, quieter life
-to walk a little softer
-to gain self-sustainability
-to not have roommates, to live alone
-to be actively involved in my community
-to be actively involved in an inspiring arts scene
-to do work that I love
-to be closer to nature
Step Two - Research your options for making the change a reality.
My lease on this apartment ends on June 30th. My job is transient.
These two points were pretty impact-ful; but when I realized that all the "stability" in my life was actually base-less, I didn't stress out. Or rather, I totally stressed out, but in a sort-of-productive way. I didn't focus on the lack of stability, but on the incredible and overwhelming array of OPTIONS I'd discovered.
EVERYTHING was possible.
Step Three - When a particular option really resonates with you, pick that one.
Part of my research was talking to my partner, who recommended a little town called Almonte.
It's out of the city by about 20 minutes, there's a river, a mill, some rapids. It has a grocery store, a hardware store, a drug store, parks, boardwalks, art galleries, studios, and the rent (if you can find available apartments) is affordable enough that I could afford to live alone.
There are a ton of little shops and restaurants where I could sell the stuff I make, or work (hooray for a hefty span of dishwashing on my resume!). And in area covered, it's actually bigger than all of Centretown, where I’ve been sequestered in hibernation for the last year.
Best of all, everything I’ve read suggests that the people who live there love their community. I'm craving some community involvement in my life, the freedom to easily fall in love with my neighborhood, and create a home (or a nest) for myself. There are a hundred boards and committees (oh, Canada) that I can work with. There are activities and groups that feel accessible, even online, that will enable me to connect with my neighbors.
These are all qualities that line up with the changes I needed to make. And they resonate.
Step Four - Research this particular option further.
This is where I discovered the video-game magic of Google Street View. I spent about 4 hours one night "walking" the streets of my prospective new neighborhood. And I like the look of it. Then I spent 2 nights reading everything I could find online about Life in Almonte. And I like the look of all that, too.
I found about half-a-dozen viable options for employment, a few available (affordable) apartments.
This is where I decided it's In Fact a good idea - it makes sense and feels good. It gives me the things I need.
Step Five - Procrastinate
This can (and did) take the form of writing about it, talking about it, sleeping on it, thinking about it, or just waiting and being patient.
I've been horrendously (yes, horrendously) productive in all the day-to-day stuff I usually put off: housework, creating, reading, writing, seeing my friends.. but not actually contacting anyone. Passivity rules. But it doesn't git 'er done.
Just Wednesday, I had an attack of guilt and disappointment about not having done anything yet. I went and hung out with some friends, told them what my hangups were, what I wanted my approach to be, and what I wanted to achieve, and inside of an hour, I had a direction. Now, 2 days later, I have about 15 blog posts started (this is the first), everything that's been trapped inside my head down on paper, a few emails sent, and renewed motivation.
Just because you're not doing anything doesn't mean you're not getting anywhere.
Step Six - Quit procrastinating. Take Action.
2012 is Joy Campbell's Year of Action. A couple years ago, someone said to me, kind of disparagingly, "Well, Joy, you're hardly a do-er." And I thought about that for a long time (is that irony?), and finally, just this February, decided maybe I could be a do-er.
I'm still learning. About fear and vulnerability, about finding balance, about excitement and passion, and about always-changing wants and needs and goals and dreams.
I want to not only be the star, but the director of my own life.